MHM Magazine

32 | MENTAL HEALTH MATTERS | 2023 | Issue 1 MHM leaving me unable to make even the simplest of decisions. Once again, I was admitted, this time as an involuntary patient. This time I refused to comply with the recommendations or the script, to my own downfall. This lasted for a while. However during my stay in hospital, I was blessed to find a long-lasting friendship with a fellow patient, who was going through a deep depression. We developed a close bond, he became a close confidant, someone who didn’t judge my by the stigma of a disease but who saw great value in me, even when I couldn’t see it myself. We gave each other support by uplifting each other in dark times. It was a relief to find a friend that understood who I was, and didn’t judge me unfairly. We continue to support each other, and even our families share a close bond. To be clear, I was not failed in any capacity by health officials. They gave me the tools to help myself. However, the experience has highlighted the importance of embracing our mental health, of not being ashamed of it. There is tremendous value in having an outlet, whether that is via a supportive inner circle, or outside intervention such as being open to various treatments including psychiatric and psychological interventions. Traditional methods didn’t work for me, because they didn’t treat the root of the problem. Many times, I was made to feel like I was the problem. I was ostracised and felt let down. The path I’ve chosen has given me the understanding to know that this disease is separate to who I am. It can be controlled, it can be conquered but I have to take charge of my own life and be the maker of my own path. Much more is needed in terms of educating our communities. Children should never experience what I experienced, and the sad reality is that despite all the advances in technology and social interaction making the world a smaller place, we’re still found lacking in making these resources for help available to our younger generation. When it comes to mental health, making professional avenues of help available to all those in need within our communities should be prioritised. Traditional remedies will always have a place in our communities, but they should never supersede acquiring professional help. Psychiatric intervention saved my life and gave me my identity back. Delving into the ideologies of behaviorism, and psychoanalytics, I find myself wavering on the side of psychoanalytics. Indeed I allowed my community to choose my identity, rather than embracing who I was. Ultimately, I had to seek help and find the courage to be who I am, without shame, without doubt and without guilt. In the end, I am who I am, because I choose to be. In the eternal words of Carl Jung, the first half of life has no meaning, what is important is to be aware of aspects of self that have been neglected. For myself, I see the improvement in my mental health every day. That is not to say that the hallucinations won’t come back but be assured that should they come back, I now have the tools to conquer this fight.